Posted by SseanN on April 11, 2000 at 07:34:08:
In Reply to: If you like comedy you gotta see this. posted by imperial blade on April 10, 2000 at 22:33:24:
> When this bard walked in with his merc I had just gotten rid of poison and famine and was starting to remove plague. I try to move but notice I have no moves....uh oh...
>
>
> <24%hp 26%m -4%mv> where
>
> Rilliarche sings 'Cold be hand and heart and bone,
> And cold be sleep under stone:
> Never more to wake on stony bed,
> Never, till the Sun fails and the Moon is dead.'
> A coldness descends upon you; you feel yourself falling deeply asleep.
>
> <24%hp 26%m -4%mv> In your dreams, or what?
>
> <24%hp 26%m -4%mv>
> You feel your linguistic skills disappear.
>
> <24%hp 26%m -4%mv> sc
> You are Indican the Greater Demon Slayer, level 26, 21 years old (33 hours).
> You are young.
> Race: felar Sex: male Class: warrior Hometown: Galadon
> You are at 24% hit, 26% mana, -4% movement.
> You have 2 practices, 0 training sessions and 0 weapon specializations.
> You are carrying 20/36 items.
> Your items weigh 181 pounds and 0 ounces (maximum of 245 pounds).
> Str: 17(17) Int: 17(17) Wis: 18(18) Dex: 23(23) Con: 22(23) Chr: 16(16)
> You have scored 150921 exp, and have 98192 gold coins.
> You need 10079 exp to level.
> Wimpy set to 0% of max hit points.
> You are sleeping.
> Armor: pierce: -89 bash: -84 slash: -91 magic: 38
> You are almost invulnerable to piercing.
> You are almost invulnerable to bashing.
> You are almost invulnerable to slashing.
> You are somewhat armored against magic.
> Hitroll: 23 Damroll: 22.
> You are specialized in spears and staffs.
> You are evil. You have a lawful ethos.
> You have chosen the sphere of Justice.
> You are affected by:
> Power: 'gibberish' modifies none by 0 for 8 hours.
> Skill: 'sleep' modifies none by 0 for 5 hours.
> Physical malady: 'plague' modifies strength by -5 for 13 hours.
> Skill: 'warcry' modifies save vs spell by -6 for 14 hours.
> Skill: 'warcry' modifies hit roll by 3 for 14 hours.
>
> <24%hp 26%m -4%mv>
> You writhe in agony from the plague.
> You sure are BLEEDING!
>
> <24%hp 18%m -9%mv> wake
> s
> You are already standing.
>
> <24%hp 18%m -9%mv> Rilliarche looks at you.
> You are too exhausted.
>
> <24%hp 18%m -9%mv> l
> By the Temple Altar
> A huge chunk of black obsidian stone has been fashioned into a death bed
> for the sacrifices the Dark God demands. Terrified slaves are brought in
> from the slave pens to the west to be gutted on this evil monument. Torches
> hang on the walls to cast a fitful light over the dark enterprise. A torture
> chamber lies to the north and the priest's chambers lie to the east.
>
> [Exits: north east south west]
> ( 2) A greenish-brown pile of cloth blends with the ground here.
> A small iron flail is here.
> A lightweight padded polearm intended for weapons practice lies here.
> A metal canteen lies here on the ground.
> ( 8) A rolled up map is here.
> A pit for sacrifices is in front of the altar.
> (Charmed) A giant mercenary stands ready here.
> Rilliarche the wood-elf is here.
> A cityguard is strolling through here, keeping the peace.
> (White Aura) The healer is here, passing out heals and death.
>
> <24%hp 18%m -9%mv>
> You yell 'Kimv! J re mfniw ueijmhtt gl Dgzqjcdcqv!'
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> Rilliarche has a few scratches.
>
> <24%hp 18%m -9%mv>
> You dodge Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your defensive spin deflects Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Rilliarche dodges your slice.
> Your slice wounds Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche has a few scratches.
>
> <24%hp 18%m -9%mv>
> Rilliarche trips you and you go down!
> Rilliarche's trip grazes you.
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> Rilliarche has a few scratches.
>
> <23%hp 18%m -9%mv>
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You dodge Rilliarche's cleave.
> Rilliarche parries your slice.
> Rilliarche dodges your slice.
> Your claw injures Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche has some small but disgusting cuts.
>
> <23%hp 18%m -9%mv>
> You parry a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You dodge Rilliarche's cleave.
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your slice decimates Rilliarche!
> Your claw decimates Rilliarche!
> Your claw wounds Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <23%hp 18%m -9%mv>
> You writhe in agony from the plague.
> Your sickness grazes you.
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <23%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> Rilliarche trips you and you go down!
> Rilliarche's trip scratches you.
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <22%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> You dodge a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Rilliarche's cleave maims you!
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your slice misses Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <17%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> You dodge a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You parry a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> Rilliarche parries your slice.
> Your claw mauls Rilliarche.
> Your slice decimates Rilliarche!
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <17%hp 8%m -14%mv> di
> Your kicked dirt misses Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <17%hp 8%m -14%mv> A giant mercenary rescues Rilliarche!
> A giant mercenary is in perfect health.
>
> <17%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> You dodge a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your defensive spin deflects Rilliarche's cleave.
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> You dodge Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your slice decimates a giant mercenary!
> A giant mercenary dodges your slice.
> A giant mercenary parries your slice.
> A giant mercenary has a few scratches.
>
> <17%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects Rilliarche's cleave.
> A giant mercenary parries your slice.
> A giant mercenary dodges your slice.
> Your claw injures a giant mercenary.
> A giant mercenary has a few scratches.
>
> <17%hp 8%m -14%mv> h rilliarche
>
> Rilliarche trips you and you go down!
> Rilliarche's trip grazes you.
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> A giant mercenary has a few scratches.
>
> <16%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> You dodge a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your slice decimates a giant mercenary!
> Your claw wounds a giant mercenary.
> Your slice mauls a giant mercenary.
> A giant mercenary has some small but disgusting cuts.
>
> <16%hp 8%m -14%mv> heal heal
> heal heal
>
> You dodge a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> Your defensive spin deflects Rilliarche's cleave.
> A giant mercenary parries your slice.
> Your claw decimates a giant mercenary!
> A giant mercenary has some small but disgusting cuts.
>
> <16%hp 8%m -14%mv> You start aiming at Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <16%hp 8%m -14%mv> Rilliarche trips you and you go down!
> Rilliarche's trip scratches you.
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> Rilliarche is covered with bleeding wounds.
>
> <15%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> You dodge a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> Rilliarche dodges your slice.
> Your claw mauls Rilliarche.
> Your slice wounds Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is gushing blood.
>
> <15%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> heal critical
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> A giant mercenary's pierce devastates you!
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> You dodge Rilliarche's cleave.
> Rilliarche parries your slice.
> Your claw wounds Rilliarche.
> Your slice decimates Rilliarche!
> Rilliarche is writhing in agony.
>
> <10%hp 8%m -14%mv> The healer utters the words 'pzar'.
> A warm feeling fills your body.
> Rilliarche is writhing in agony.
>
> <27%hp 8%m -14%mv> Rilliarche lets loose with a wild roundhouse!
> Rilliarche's roundhouse maims you!
> You sure are BLEEDING!
> You parry a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You parry a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> Rilliarche parries your slice.
> Your claw injures Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche dodges your slice.
> Your claw wounds Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is writhing in agony.
>
> <21%hp 8%m -14%mv> heal critical
> The healer utters the words 'pzar'.
> A warm feeling fills your body.
> Your defensive spin deflects a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You parry Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your slice wounds Rilliarche.
> Your claw wounds Rilliarche.
> Your slice mauls Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is convulsing on the ground.
>
> <37%hp 8%m -14%mv>
> You dodge a giant mercenary's pierce.
> You dodge Rilliarche's cleave.
> You dodge Rilliarche's cleave.
> Your slice wounds Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is mortally wounded, and will die soon, if not aided.
> Your claw wounds Rilliarche.
> Rilliarche is DEAD!!
> Rilliarche's leg is sliced from his dead body.
> A giant mercenary slowly fades away.
>
> <37%hp 8%m -14%mv> The healer utters the words 'judicandus qfuhuqar'.
> You feel better!
>
> <49%hp 8%m -14%mv>
>
> You writhe in agony from the plague.
> Gorgrael shivers and looks very ill.
> Your sickness grazes you.
>
> <48%hp -1%m -18%mv> The healer utters the words 'judicandus qfuhuqar'.
> You feel better!
>
>
> <58%hp -1%m -18%mv> exa corpse
> The corpse of Rilliarche is lying here.
> When you look inside, you see:
> The corpse of Rilliarche contains:
> the Dwarven ring
> (2) cloak of Nightwing
> some black steel sleeves
> some black steel chainmail
> some black steel leggings
> (Glowing) the cobbler's shoes
> the girdle of endless space
> (Glowing) a heron-marked blade
> a serpentine black bracer
> a strange black opal
> a banjo
> a bag of tricks
> a bunch of carrots
> a pitch-black belt
> a metal canteen insulated in a wolf's pelt
> a water bottle
> a canoe
> black gloves
> 20839 gold coins
>
>
>
> <90%hp -40%m -38%mv>
> Rilliarche tells you 'well, that made a lot of sense.'
>
> <90%hp -40%m -38%mv>