Posted by Joshu on October 10, 2000 at 12:38:01:
In Reply to: The tale of "Dansu, Mortal Lord of the Earth" posted by Ingvar(VIP) on October 10, 2000 at 12:35:14:
> The note Arcane refers to, which by shockingly good fortune is preserved among our archives: > [ 30] Ingvar: Lord of the Earth. > I scribe this note on behalf of Dansu, a felar Swordmaster, and take > I repeat, these thoughts are not mine, and I bear neither credit or > -------------------------- > ----- Signed, > Dutifully scribed and painfully edited by Ingvar Vittfaren, a bard of little repute. > One day, when Ingvar was but a youngin', spamming "cold be sleep" from the safety of his Eryn Galen guild, a warrior named Dansu asked him the mighty question "Group?". Ingvar was very busy spamming, and quite drunk, but he amused himself by chatting with Dansu a bit. Dansu suggested going to Galadon to kill Battlement Guards, and didn't seem to understand when Ingvar told him that Galadon was a vast cesspool, the very thought of which nauseated him. Ingvar certainly didn't want to get off his drunken butt to go there, where he would have to endure the corrupted Profane, watching them teach the ignorant masses their flawed worldview. Though the Aspects of the Voice and Flame called Ingvar at this thought... he wished to bide his time, and strike at Galadon when he was more sure of his training. > Dansu countered with the brilliant observation that the guards there were "good xp", and that Ingvar was an "asshole". Both of these were likely true, of course. Ingvar's witty repartee was met by some rather nasty claims by Dansu. Ingvar soon decided he did not like Dansu. > Soon, shortly after telling Dansu something, he immediately received a "reply" along the lines of "This asshole bard is talking shit. Let's gang him." Ingvar was quite perturbed. Dansu recovered from this blunder nicely, however, and told Ingvar the he and a bunch of his friends would soon find and slay him. Ingvar wasn't sure how many level 15-18 warriors it would take to force open the Eryn Galen Bard Guild, but he wasn't sure Dansu had quite that many friends, and he did own a teleport potion. > So he busted out the worst weapon any level 16 bard could wield: note to all. > At the time, Wollscheid was unquestionably the biggest idiot in all of Thera. He had this whole pathetic routine of how he was "Lord of the Sky", soon to whoop ass on any who entered "his domain". Something about Dansu reminded Ingvar of dear Wollscheid. > And thus was born Ingvar's first published work of fiction. You see, Ingvar was never a brawler. An awful lot of people whooped his ass, actually. But there was something so much more satisfying than swordplay for young Ingvar.... the thought of seeing those he hated utterly broken. (After luring more than a couple of Paladins into doing some unpaladinly things like lying and breaking the Law, as an example.) The Profane certainly believed every other lie that had been sent their way. Surely they would also believe a very big lie, even if it was told to them by a complete stranger from a far-off village. > Not long after, Ingvar passed Dansu's corpse on the Eastern Road. He did ask himself... "surely, he wasn't quite dumb enough to be out here when...." > But then Ingvar decided he was thinking about silly things. He had a shrine to visit.
> Wed Jan 26 22:19:59 2000
> To: all
> Hail Therans!
> no responsibility for its content.
> blame for them. I want to emphasize that point.
> I, Dansu, as a loyal follower of the mighty Wollscheid, proclaim myself
> to be the Mortal Lord of the Earth. As such, you must respect me and my
> gang, or we will find you and kill you. My gang's territory runs from
> Galadon to Ofcol and New Thalos, and the roads in between. If we find you
> in our territory, you must give us 500 gold or we kill you. If you want
> to join our gang, send me a note or tell me, and I will let you if you are
> strong and tough and a good fighter. I have six members already.
> ----- Dansu, the Mighty.
> ---------------------------