> There are so many things to laugh at in this story - the way the blithe tone contrasts with the subject matter <br> <br>This is honestly the way I talk. It's a british thing I guess. But it can make even the most dire of circumstances sound hilarious. <br> <br> <br>>(which in itself is a bizarre contradiction: it revolves around a 5 day "committed" relationship), <br> <br>The relationship wasn't 5 days old. But my so-called 'commitment to a relationship' was. <br> <br>> and I haven't even mentioned the gothic fairy. It just goes on and on. <br> <br>You'd have to see it to believe it. I wore black flares, a sleeveless sleek black working out t-shirt (tight), did my hair up like something out of a Midsummer Nights Dream (Puck!), green eyeshadow and silver makeup. Apparently I looked incredibly hot. The costume was designed by the girl I've been dating. <br> <br>> I really wish I knew what a Deva and "the Valleys" are because I'm sure that would make it even more hilarious. <br> <br>'a Deva' is what the girl described herself as. I would have called her a fallen angel. <br> <br>The Valleys is an area of Wales known for it's eccentricly welsh roots. All the local 'chavs' usually come from that area so anyone in the Cardiff area with a welsh accent usually is a Chav. This girl was from Swansea, and had the smoothest welsh voice I've heard to date that didn't come dressed in a tracksuit with a bottle of white lightning (cheapest cider on the market) in one hand. <br> <br>> But seriously.. are you for real? <br> <br>Unfortunately, yes. Hence the OTT self-sabotage. I've got nowhere else to turn to get punished for this. My mates think I'm awesome for pulling her, my girlfriend can't know and anyone else doesn't care enough to say 'you're a bastard'. AA seemed to be bringing out the cheapshot crew, so I thought I may as well give them something to shoot at. <br> <br>It's the internet - if I can't use it as a tool for making me a better person, then what else is it good for? <br> <br>End rant. <br> <br>Yhorian