Other Nexans may give you shit about it because they're ignorant hacks, but you can have 'resources' and 'allies' just fine without having to betray people.
All you do is make sure those resources are directed toward convincing Nexus that Nexus has bigger fish to fry. Usually this means your potential allies need to be largely uncaballed if they want to remain allies outside of convienient circumstances because otherwise they'll be forced to defend a cabal against you.
That was why I would be grouped with Kardulak even when Balance tipped his direction. I wouldn't necessarily go out of my way to tell him when Porenn was around (because they fought like cats and dogs, one of them attacked the other first and I don't even remember.) But more often than not, since he was evil chaotic, most Ragers affected the Balance and the Veil more than he did so it made sense not to off him since I needed him to summon to the wilderness and he needed me to pin people in place so he could get more than a single charge on occasion. He got 6 from susubienko.
PK hungry players gravitate toward the cabal because their enemies vary. The cabal powers do blow ass if you don't have a willing partner to basically obey your every command but still be competent enough to think for themselves. I never once had a transmuter bonded with me for instance, and I would never have died to any Ragers whatsoever if I did and that transmuter just spammed reduce... not even any buffs or debuffs. Once you get the former, as Crafted's perma shows, you can pretty much be better than most other cabals but at the cost of potentially being the only competent pair *in* the cabal. It doesn't take a genius to use/abuse bond properly, but Nexus has it's fair share of Fortress and Herald layovers.
I agree with your last paragraph on Nexus but the fact of the matter is Nexans are as free to vary in philosophy as Outlanders, *within the framework of a true neutral ethos and current balance*. Take from that how you will, but only incompetent retards that don't need anyone outside the cabal are going to insist you backstab your allies in relationships you cultivate. You may not be grouped with them for ranking but PK is another matter provided you ONLY kill what tips. Likewise, unless the cabal leader finds you out and tells you to change locales, you can rank on whatever you want up until the balance actually tips to an extreme. More often than not, despite the liches, the balance usually tips to Light as an extreme.