"Yer a wizard, Harry!" said Thrym as he cleaved Harry in twain (horizontally, of course, as only wizards chopped vertically).

Harry, shoving a mote of light into his mouth that was either life surge or LSD, pulled his half-body towards the orphanage, leaving a trail of red behind him (he had a red crayon stuck to his shirt rubbing the ground).

"Greeting....Orph...Orphanage.." said Harry to the door in front of him.

His vision faded as his strength left him, and he let his head fall to the ground.

He woke up a few days later, somehow fully healed, in massive amounts of progging armor, and for some reason he had the faint taste of shit on his tongue.

"Congratulations!" An Immortal of the Fortress said, "You have been Maranated!

"Marinated!?!?" Harry screamed in fear, "OH NO, I DON'T WANT TO BE EATEN".

Nobody laughed because it was a bad joke.

Tiamat walked in casually, swinging her chain, and handed Harry a bundle of flowers. "Look....Harry...I mean...I was really worried. I really don't want to lose you again. Not like that. I just...I missed you Harry. Yer' my best friend, 'Arry". Tiamat was cutely fiddling with her fingers, looking down as if she were embarrassed.

Harry smiled at her and took a big whiff of the flowers. "Look, Tiamat, it's okay. Because HERE'S A BIG BLIZZAAARDD!"

Tiamat screamed as her blood began to freeze, she shouted "YER' A BLIZZARD, 'ARRY!" and fell to the ground, shattering into a thousand pieces.

Suddenly the phone rang.

An Immortal of the Fortress picked it up, said "Mhmm" then looked to Harry. "It's your dad, Harry"

Harry frowned, "My dad is dead"

An Immortal of the Fortress turned white with fright. "THEN WHO WAS PHONE?"



As fun as it was to hide in the shadows as an assassin and watch this story unfold, you decide it is best to log off CF and go to sleep before things get any wierder. You set your alarm clock and begin to doze off...

pls respond