I agree with some of your post. I *can* be a little Intentionally harsh sometimes, to make various points.
AND!
I *PAY* a very real and hefty PRICE for said vocal criticism of *people* who are in 100% and with unique power no less, in control of a specific universe within our reality. To clarify, for those who PRETEND they cant read simple and plain English: I am indeed referencing this very sites, pseudo-affiliated, RP and Pk MUD and text-based video(?) game Carrionfields.
Has anyone, Im asking not assuming, noticed that no character of mine as made leader in a bit? Do you want to know why, when I *chose* to scream nonsense at a particularly annoying Tribunal, I *knew* I had to be as fast as possible if I wanted to scream *enough* nonsense for this particular Tribunal to understand what I intended? Because I was like 96% positive IMMS were watching ME like a hawk! Waiting to pounce when I did a human, absolutely worth it, and also not so great thing, so they could try making people think Im some drunk loudmouth. When in reality, I havent seriously drank in about 3 years, and *only* play sober. How else *could* I do what I do?
Anyway, I talk like I do because Im not living in a made up fantasy like, apparently upwards of 51% of the VOTING AMERICAN PUBLIC! CF is a game. I play for fun, and unique challenge, and (increasingly) an oddity that is outlandishly fascinating. When you play the way I choose to play, the game of CF per concept and function has a *life* of its (yes the inanimate game) own.
I dont feel like explaining that thought. Its just a chore I dont feel like undertaking. What I mean is, the IMMS while hard working, fun, usually not an issue and often another *uniquely* fascinating curiosity that are capable of making *real* change in a players thought process (looking at you, specifically, Rahsael,. I swear on my life, some of my best times EVER playing CF happened in Your, Rahsael, shrine. I cannot realistically describe how *well* you aided and guided my thoughts on RP as a concept and how to be applied AND some small but cool thoughts on life in general. WOW! Big stuff), they maintain and make good changes usually and more stuff but we dont have all day.
However, along with all of that, ALSO I have been talked *down* to in such tones, since I was like 13 years old, by some of the most in their feelings and ABSURDLY judgmental (often Very Arbitrarily and/or outright silly things that are often vague as shit by concept and design of our lack of omnipotent power), that I just REFUSE to submit and roll over for people who talk to PLAYERS of their game and ideally their, per my basic level of fundamental human thoughts on time management) kind of people.
And their arbitrary and sometimes grief levels of spite can really hit a nerve. But its Yes, ultimately, ok. Why? Because were human. And I know they are trying hard and doing a mostly good job. And this game is fucking crazy fun and unique.
With all that said, if Im not welcomed back, ultimately I WILL press forward. Its not a thought. Its what I will do as long as Im alive. AND I will continue to strive for my *best*. And by that I mean I will make unique characters. Focus on who *they* are and why they are in Thera, and how to do so with lots and lots of laughs and as few trolls as possible. And, I wasnt gonna mention this part cuz I assume its blatantly obvious, THRASH with EXTREME PREJUDICE, any fool who dare exist as my enemy.
Maybe Ill be back, maybe not. See you, perhaps, in these fields fellow curious traveler one day.
